An Ideal Husband from an Islamic Perspective

By Kaniz Fatma, New Age Islam 5 June 2024 Islamic Perspective on Husbandhood Main Points: 1. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) emphasized the importance of treating his family well and showing good manners. 2. The Prophet's life is a guiding beacon for men, demonstrating kindness, love, affection, cheerfulness, forgiveness, and respect for family. 3. The worst individual is the one who causes trouble in his family. 4. Husband and wife are a source of comfort for each other, as stated in the Holy Quran. 5. An ideal husband should be caring, loving, morally good, forgiving, and compassionate, as these are the teachings of the Prophetic teachings. ------ What does it mean to be a husband from an Islamic perspective? Is it merely his job to provide his family with food, housing, and clothing, or does he have additional responsibilities? In this article, we'll look at what an ideal husband should be from an Islamic perspective. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “The best among you is the one who is the best to his family, and I am the best from you to my family.” This hadith was narrated by Hazrat Ayesha (may Allah be pleased with her) (Jami Tirmidhi 3921) Hazrat Ibn Abbas reported: The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “The best of you are those who are best to women.” (Al-Mustadrak alaa al-Sahihayn 7407) Ahl means "family" in Arabic, which encompasses blood relations, spouses, children, friends, loved ones, and peer groups. According to the hadiths cited above, the best person is the one who treats his family with kindness and respect. Although Islam instructs Muslims to treat all members of society with goodness and grace, this hadith concentrates on the family since being a decent family member, especially with one's wife, is difficult and deserves praise. Allah Almighty states in the Holy Quran: “And deal with them (women) kindly.” (4:19) Hazrat Abdullah Bin Abbas clarified that this verse is about those who despise their wives and misbehave with them. Throughout the verse, Allah Almighty commands men to treat women well. This verse serves as a reminder to people who abuse their spouse. This verse is not intended to condemn crimes against women solely during the Jahiliyyah period, but rather to teach how to interact with women of all ages. Today, our society also needs to reform in this regard. Harassing spouses, forcing them to waive the Mehr, not paying their rights, causing mental pain, sometimes having the lady sit in her parents' house and sometimes keeping her in her own house and preventing the conversation, scolding in front of others, and so on have become quite widespread. The poor wife follows her husband, who moves on like a pharaoh. Several sorts of cruelty take place in homes. May Allah Almighty make people aware of this verse of the Qur'an and prohibit them from participating in wrongdoing. Furthermore, in view of the Quranic tet, those who claim that Islam imposes severe limits on women must acknowledge that Islam either causes hardship to women or defends them from suffering. The Quran explicitly instructs men to treat their women with kindness, to make their acts and appearance appealing to them to the best of their ability, and to treat them in the same way that they wish to be treated. According to Hadith studies, some prophetic instructions for treating women are as follows: 1. When you eat, feed your wife, and when you dress, clothe her as well. Do not strike her in the face, do not speak ill of her, and if you must [temporarily] split from her, do so in the house. [Sunan Abi Dawud: 2142) 2. The worst individual is the one who causes difficulty in his family. "How does he trouble [them]?" was the question. He (peace be upon him) responded, "When he enters the house, the wife becomes terrified, the children flee, and the houseworkers become apprehensive. When he leaves the house, the wife rejoices, and the other family members breathe a sigh of relief.”[Al-Mujam al-Awsaṭ: 8798] 3. The most ideal believer is the one who has the best morals and is the gentlest with his family. [Jami Tirmidhi: 2621] The blessed life of the Final Prophet (peace be upon him) serves as a guiding beacon for us in this regard. He (peace be upon him) would welcome people to Islam, meet with delegations, attend funerals, visit the ill, and assist the needy. Despite his various obligations and responsibilities, the beloved Prophet (peace be upon him) was gentle and sympathetic with his blessed wife, exchanging smiles, listening to their problems, and caring for them. After Asr Salah, he would pay them a visit to inquire about their health. The Prophet (peace be upon him) would not disturb his family at night after returning from a journey, preferring to see them in the morning or evening. [Sahih Muslim: 4962] All of this indicates that men should be kind to their wives, speak well of them, show them love and affection, be jovial and casual with them, forgive their transgressions, abstain from conflict, uphold their honour, and make every effort to prevent arguments, show generosity towards them, and show respect for their families. Islam instructs women to treat their husbands like role models, just as it encourage men to be ideal husbands. To demonstrate good character to her spouse, a woman should really care for him, avoid arguments with him, respect his wishes that align with Islam, and speak to him with deference. She ought to protect his dignity and possessions while he is away. She should be full of patience and forbearance, and she ought to be appreciative of his kindness. Her moral qualities ought to inspire reverence for her husband's relatives and loved ones, and she ought to politely inquire about them. She should be happy to see him and support his legitimate work. It is also important to note that women are allowed to work in contemporary society since a stable family needs two or more sources of income to live comfortably. They contribute significantly to the advancement of society and offer a range of services. Nonetheless, a woman is not compelled to work if she so chooses because, according to Islam, it is not her duty. Because of this freedom, women are able to contribute to the advancement of society. The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) had a deep affection for his wife. Regretfully, our peculiar idea of masculinity dictates that a man who loves his wife and dedicates his life to her needs to be mocked by friends and family for being a womaniser. Thus, this is incorrect from an Islamic perspective. Wife and husband offer solace to one another. That's what the Holy Quran says: “And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” (30:21) It is important for husbands to forgive their spouses as much as they can because mistakes are inevitable. Men should call out their wives' mistakes and encourage them to make the required corrections when their spouses make mistakes. By demonstrating forgiveness and genuine effort to find a loving solution, things can be made easier. Above all, a woman desires a man's attention. No matter how busy he is, he must find time to devote himself entirely to his wife. A woman can surely get by on less money when her spouse provides for her full-time. If he overlooks his spouse in favour of earning more money, family life may suffer. In summary, an ideal husband should be kind, loving, morally upright, forgiving, and compassionate. These are the lessons of prophecy as well. These habits, if embraced by our cultures, will be the cure to the all too common family dissolution that occurs in our communities. ------ Kaniz Fatma is a classic Islamic scholar and a regular columnist for New Age Islam. URL: https://www.newageislam.com/islamic-ideology/ideal-husband-islamic-perspective/d/132447 New Age Islam, Islam Online, Islamic Website, African Muslim News, Arab World News, South Asia News, Indian Muslim News, World Muslim News, Women in Islam, Islamic Feminism, Arab Women, Women In Arab, Islamophobia in America, Muslim Women in West, Islam Women and Feminism