Words Are Freudian Slips

By Sumit Paul, New Age Islam 29 November 2023 "Dil Ki Gahraiyon Mein Jo Hota Hai Barbas Zubaan Pe Aa Hi Jaata Hai" Bahadur Shah 'Zafar' (What's in the depths and crevices of heart/ Tends to surface on the tongue) While browsing through my old Persian diary, I came across a startling thought and stopped to mull over it: A wound on the tongue gets healed fast but a wound caused by the tongue never gets healed. Tongue is indeed made of loose leather and seldom do we think of using it carefully. Words stab deeper than any piece of iron or steel can ever. Differences caused by intemperate tongue can seldom be reconciled. Hadn't Draupadi uttered "Andhe Ke Andhe Hi Hote Hain " (Blind begets blind), Kurukshetra would never have taken place and so many lives would never have been laid down. French poet Charles Baudelaire wrote to his beloved, "Kill me if you want, but speak not sardonically." Words smart you till you die. However seemingly stoic an individual may be, it's difficult for anyone to forget the sarcasm of words and the damage caused by a rapier tongue. We can forgive a person who has hurt us but seldom do we forget the words that caused a difference, a gulf. Words are double-edged knives. They can heal as well as peel; peel your skin off. And why do words always make such a drastic and debilitating impact? Words are often rooted reflections of our mind. They're Freudian slips, involuntarily and unwittingly revealing what you really think of a person. A blow may taper off but a word cannot. Though at times, sarcastic words can galvanise you to do your damnedest, but their bitter impact cannot be mitigated. Words are always taken as premeditated actions with an intention to hurt a person. Words can even change the psychology of a person who happens to be at the receiving end. An extensive medical survey in Indian social and familial context way back in 1967 revealed that when mother-in-laws scoffed at their daughter-in-laws for not bearing an issue by calling them ‘Baanjh' or 'Vandhya' (barren, arid), they actually went barren because of the negative impact of the word and would never conceive! We all are so casual, nay frivolous, with words that we never think of their lasting consequences and ramifications. We hurt people and they hurt us in return, thanks to words, which could have been spoken with so much sensitivity and empathy. Tongue indeed causes festering wounds. To quote Salaam Machhlishahri, "Beshumaar Rishte Bigade Hain Zubaan Ne / Dar Ke Maine Apne Lab See Liye Hain" (This tongue has spoiled many a relation/ I've, therefore, sewn my lips). True. Lest you should speak out something for which you repent later, you had better keep mum. ----- A regular columnist for New Age Islam, Sumit Paul is a researcher in comparative religions, with special reference to Islam. He has contributed articles to the world's premier publications in several languages including Persian. URL: https://newageislam.com/spiritual-meditations/words-freudian-slips/d/131210 New Age Islam, Islam Online, Islamic Website, African Muslim News, Arab World News, South Asia News, Indian Muslim News, World Muslim News, Women in Islam, Islamic Feminism, Arab Women, Women In Arab, Islamophobia in America, Muslim Women in West, Islam Women and Feminism