Don't Try To Be Anyone's Teacher

By Sumit Paul, New Age Islam 2 June 2023 “We teach best what we most need to learn." -Richard Bach, ' Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah’ Har Koi Mudarris Bana Baitha Hai Mujhe Talaash Hai Taalib-E-Ilm Ki Nashtar ' Nishapuri’ (Everyone is a teacher/ I'm in quest of a student) 'Rashid' Ye Jahaan Aisa Ajeeb Baazaar Hai Salaah Muft Ki Mayassar Hai Har Dukaan Pe Rashid Barelvi ('Rashid,' this world is a weird market / You get free advice at every shop) "The mushrooming market of gurudom all over the world, esp. in India, is a proof that most of the gurus (esp. in India) suffer from the 'Pontification Syndrome' and think that they can change the lives of their slavish disciples and moronic followers. What did Muhammad, Mahavir, Moses and Jesus do? Mind you, they didn't preach. They condescended. They were all deranged megalomaniacs and narcissists and would have been in a mental asylum had they been alive today. " "Why there's no god: Simple responses to 20 common arguments for the existence of god " by Armin Navabi (he's an ex-Muslim and the founder of Atheist Republic, a massive online atheist non-profit "One of the most beautiful words not only in English but in all languages is 'pontification', wrote the British novelist Graham Greene. I too have never found a word that encapsulates so much and puts a person in his / her place without sounding too harsh. Don't most of us love to pontificate, to condescend? We patronise as if we know everything. We give pieces of advice, which are often uncalled-for. We try to change the other person to our way of thinking and labour under the misconception that we've won him/her over. We find fault with others and gloat over others' misfortune. Portuguese Nobel Laureate the late Jose Saramago wrote in the preface to his friend's novel that, "Before advising my friend to write a novel, I told him in no uncertain terms that the only way to strike a rapport with your readers is to be like one of them. Alight from your high pedestal and avoid pontification. People dislike those who give free advice. Because 'advisors' themselves are badly in need of some sound advice." Very apt words, I must say. A few days ago, I got an email from a person who I thought to have a semblance of sense. The person too turned out to be an 'advisor' and began to teach me what I should do and what not to. That exasperated me. This exasperates all. We all have follies and foibles; faults and flaws. None of us can be called perfect. Moreover, the very word 'perfection' is a misnomer, because there's no standardization of it. Advice or pontification has a kind of defence mechanism to it. We pontificate to hide our own shortcomings. We speak exactly the opposite to what we need to get rid of. In a poem written by the last great mystic Jami of Iran, a master overhears his disciple tell others to rise above the sensual pleasures. He calls the disciple and asks him whether he himself got over the carnal temptations. When the disciple says that he's not yet risen above it, the master tells him, "So long as you remain mired in any kind of temptation, it doesn't behove you to teach others. You show your own festering warts by giving yourself unnecessary importance." The problem with mankind is that we can't accept people as they're. "Love me love my dog" is an adage, we all must imbibe to the last syllable. Why this morbid itch to advise and make others kowtow to you? Frankly speaking, no one wants to be corrected. No one wants to be taught. Human beings resist, resent and eventually retaliate when they're told to follow a particular pattern. We all still have the traits of our prehistoric cave-dwelling days. Our feral instincts are dormant and diluted, not defunct. Behavioural psychologists and anthropologists say that no man (woman as well) can be completely domesticated. Any attempt to bridle that visceral instinct, even in the form of a gentle advice, is never taken very gleefully as well as gracefully. The Berlitz School of Languages, Berlitz Corporation, Princeton, New Jersey is considered to be the finest school when it comes to imparting the nuances of a foreign language. Students at this very renowned institute don't have to attend the conventional classes with black-boards as the institute believes that no one likes to be taught. Teaching is pontification. So students are exposed to the ' immersion process.' They learn the language/s without the rigmarole of being taught and pick up the linguistic idiosyncrasies of a foreign tongue through interaction with the native speakers and knowing more about that culture, because languages are interwoven with cultures. Why classroom teaching has been found lacking across the world? Because, no one loves to be told that he/she needs a particular thing to learn. Pontification is undesirable. It highlights the disparity and difference. It distances you from people, who you fallaciously think to 'profit' from your 'wisdom.' No one has time and inclination to listen to your Gyan. Moreover, there's nothing in it that they've not heard before. You don't preach anything for the first time. You're just an insignificant plagiarist with nothing new to offer. Shun it, if you want to strike a permanent chord with people around you. Love them. Don't try to be their teachers. ---- A regular columnist for New Age Islam, Sumit Paul is a researcher in comparative religions, with special reference to Islam. He has contributed articles to the world's premier publications in several languages including Persian. 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